omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Randomize
