So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Randomize
