oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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