ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
