I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
