ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
