She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
