We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
