Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
