I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
