fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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