i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize