Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize