Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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