Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
