do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
