people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize