Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
You work out of a Hotel?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Quick, to the slutcave!
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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