well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
