He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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