one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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