This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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