Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
