# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
