she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
