I love watching others lives come down to our level.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize