It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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