I feel like I'm in dance class right now
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
