Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
