she was so not down for the gang bang
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
