Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
did you just send me my own nude
Randomize
