i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
