just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize