Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
