they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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