i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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