i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
