drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize