So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
