can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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