I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
