Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
