I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
there's paper in my vomit.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
