Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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