He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
