sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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