You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
