oh god the rape fog is back!
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
