remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I don't think brook has ever known best
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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