He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
