Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
