she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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