this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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